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April 14, 2026


5:56PM I just saw myself out of my body. With my purple skin! ðŸĪŠðŸ˜ðŸ’œðŸ˜ˆðŸ‘ū


5:57pm physical body weight:


291.6 pounds/Ibs



6:08pm I went to my core and hurt it and then I went to go see myself and saw my purple eyes. 💜



6:10pm my form right now is a purple orb/sphere. I am the one.



6:30pm there are constant guards making sure that I don’t make it outside of the physical.



6:33pm I’m considering attacking the guards but then I realize that they’ll just reform again so I don’t want to waste my energy. They have not directly harmed me until I tried to get out of my physical. 



6:34pm I’ll just use my energy on my purple form.



6:36pm theres this child around me. I do not engage with him. I don’t know where he comes from



6:48pm it looks like Erif is making a comeback. I see purple fire. Currently going through a battle today.



6:54pm I live in a dark world. 



April 15, 2026


5:32pm it doesn’t feel like I have a physical body? It feels like I’m just floating in this 3D space.



5:51pm I just saw a green throne.



6:01pm I attacked this entity and I heard a loud shriek as I blasted my purple energy into it.



9:12pm Purple is being integrated into my form in the mental realm.



April 16, 2026


6:11pm I have three points of power. Starting with White, Purple, and Black.



6:59pm I’m feeling an energy spike. And a lot of anxiety.



7:04pm omg I feel so much anxiety right now



7:54pm the anxiety subsided for now but I’m discovering that who I am is really random. I don’t make much sense most of the time. Doesn’t mean I’m not intelligent though



April 17, 2026


5:45pm I’m being driven towards nothing. My whole personality is leaving me. My nonphysical self is leaving me. Who I am here is who I shall be. I was in darkness before I became conscious and it seems I shall return to that state. I feel really sad right now.



8:28pm I’m becoming Not. Giving no effs. Giving no effs is something im going to work on constantly.


April 19, 2026


3:10pm I’ve been using meditation for the wrong reason. I used it to escape but I need to use it for grounding.



8:21pm I feel like I’m all over the place. 



8:39pm I don’t feel good. I put so much strain on myself and it shows. Sigh.



8:43pm I’m just observing my emotions at this point.



April 20, 2026


4:05pm I just got home from my therapist and I feel so good. Great day today



7:48pm starting a subconscious mind hypnosis 



9:08pm I’m too afraid to look at myself. But I’m feeling better.



9:14pm my new personality is neutral 



April 21, 2026


6:29pm I hate existing. It feels rude.



6:40pm im feeling a disgust towards the collective. I’m an individual. I’m different.



6:50pm im feeling tired of my inner world. But I also feel a responsibility towards it. I can’t chill. I try but I just cannot.



6:55pm I’m so jealous of all the people that have passed away. Because I want that to be me. I just want to be with myself in my own reality already. Life is so ugh. It’s good right now and for some reason I’m still not happy.



7:04pm I feel like earth is an energy harvesting place. It’s not fair. I deserve better than this.



10:04pm I was sad but then realized I don’t care. ðŸĪ·‍♂️ 



April 22, 2026


5:19pm I hate the creator. What a joke.



6:21pm im the creator now. I am the boss of my reality.



April 23, 2026


12:03pm I bloom in the dark.



3:57pm I feel like I wanna give up on everything. I just stay calm throughout this process but each day it gets harder.



4:12pm I feel so irritated right now



6:10pm I just need a break from everything. But I don’t know how to take one because something always comes up.



7:57pm I’m learning that there were multiple creators. Not just one big one. That one big one had something to do with the collective mindset, which I despise.



9:23pm I just learned tonight that the Self cannot be destroyed. I can now finally relax. I’ve seen and witnessed evidence of this today.



April 24, 2026


9:36pm I have everything I need right here right now.



April 25, 2026


12:33pm I had an experience with the dream police. I had a dream I was flying willingly, and I felt a presence coming after me. I then woke up cause the presence felt scary



4:45pm no matter what happens, all I know is I’m an individual, and I cannot be destroyed.



6:28pm I love dreaming



7:47pm I feel restless



April 26, 2026


8:47pm I believe I am closed individualism.

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