Jesse’s Journal: Entry 32

Jesse’s Journal: Entry 32

April 19th, 2025 Saturday….

5:35PM: I can feel my hatred beginning to leave. As if Jesse is restoring me. Actually yes, Jesse is restoring me. I can see him in a deeply focused state just working on renewal…

5:37PM: I feel as though I no longer hate anyone anymore… There is more understanding towards others.

The Name Method Part 1: The Introduction….

6:11PM: There is something that I call the Name Method. It helps me take my spirit Jesse into different places. 

7:26PM: The green demon is still within me. At least a piece of him still is. He is still attached within me. Jesse is allowing this to happen for some reason? He likes to have fun with the green demon and he does not want to let him go. Hm… how can I severe the connection between us and the green demon? Now that is the real question…

7:30PM: The green demon is speaking to me through my blood. But why is he allowed so much access to me? I rebuke this.

Deciphering My Name: Deciphering Jesse’s Name…..

7:35PM: Hm just typing this to see how it looks do not mind me……

Jesse (There is a radiant bright light filled with many colors shining and a crown of radiance associated alongside this particular spelling….)

Jehsi (This spelling takes me to the desert. I can see people walking their camels during biblical times… I also feel more connected with Yahuah with this spelling….)

Jeci 

Jecee (I used this spelling during my high school years)

Jehcee

Jesee 

Jesi (Still the same desert vibe. Hm interesting)

Hm…..

7:37PM: I also would like for my symbol to be a J. I find it very interesting that the beginning of my name starts with J, and the ending of the name ends with an E. And my artist name, which is Einai Sasa, starts with an E. So Jay is my primal name. E is the name for my future. Einai. I have had that name for multiple years now, since the early 2020’s I believe. And now here we are, mid-2020’s, and I am still using my ending name. Also the word end starts with an E as well so there is that to think about as well. So Jay End. Jay…. I remember years ago I had the username Wittle Jay. JAY. J and E. So as focus my name is Einai Sasa when it comes to my work. And yet my movies shall be credited as directly Jesse Njoki in the ending credits. Hm. Just so much to decipher and figure out.

7:46PM: Back a few years ago when Yahusha and I collided, I would see that the letter J in my name as Jesse resembled a hook….. And this drew me to the oceans and such.

7:53PM: The green demon is consuming my blood. Hm. Just reporting.

8:03PM: I can see my inner world beginning to build itself. I need to have moments where I am shutting out the physical world completely. I need to allow myself to dissociate a little bit from earth. I must allow Jesse to completely and fully drive me. Here we go, the beginning of my Rejection Experiment. Where I reject my psychotic medication and my vitamins as well. I am not sure what shall happen, but I do know that I am capable of handling whatever comes my way….

8:08PM: I just saw this green sparkle that I can only guess was from the green demon, and it was then followed by the fluid to my black ocean evaporating upwards…. This was seen by me but only for a brief moment.

8:13PM: I can briefly make out Jesse’s appearance behind me. He has jet black eyes. I can slowly make out orange skin. And red sharp-looking teeth. But Jesse’s overall energy is a jet black color. He has a blood red chest and orange limbs with hints of grey and brown….

8:16PM: I am seeing sparks….. Orange sparks here and there.

8:21PM: When I connect with my spirit I hear some frequencies off and on…..

8:23PM: I can see my blood forming deep under my skin within my right arm. I am very foreign to the concept of blood. It feels nauseating to me just thinking about it….

8:35PM: Now that I am undergoing the Rejection Experiment and Rejection Project, I will be going to sleep feeling more free. And not confound by any of the drugs that they gave me…..

8:49PM: I have figured it out! I need to focus on the FOCUS! Process on the process! Focus on the focus!

8:56PM: I am focusing on what is happening behind me. This is how I am able to see myself. This is how I am able to see Jesse. It seems as though the only form of myself I can see is my head. Sometimes there is a body that is present and can be seen. But my spirit form Jesse only has his head visible. In every angle.

9:05PM: Jesse wants me to have a guardian spider. Oh shit….. As someone had their rabbits, I shall have my spiders. But this spider is gentle with me. I am so scared of seeing it however. 9:08PM: I have severe arachnophobia incase you all have not yet realized.

9:14PM: I am going to post this diary entry….