Entry #16: Changes, A Brief History About the Performing Arts, and Personal Rants
February 7th, 2025 on Friday…..
4:49PM: I have unfortunate news. My LiveJournal account has been suspended. I do not know why this happened yet. But all I can do is just move onto the next Public Website. My Public Journals so far are Blogger/Blogspot, and Facebook. It used to be LiveJournal but oh well. If they somehow lift the suspension then I shall continue. But oh well. The point I am trying to make, is that I move on. I have to move on. I have to keep going. Nothing lasts forever. Changes.
4:54PM: Let me look into why LiveJournal suspended my account….
4:55PM: Google’s AI Overview states…
“AI Overview
A LiveJournal account can be suspended for various reasons, most commonly due to violating the platform's Terms of Service, which could include posting content that is considered inappropriate, harmful, or illegal, like explicit material, hate speech, or content that promotes child abuse, even if it's not directly illegal; repeated spam or abuse; or suspected security breaches like unauthorized access to your account.
Key points to remember about LiveJournal suspensions:
- Content violations:
- This is the most common reason for suspension, including posting content that falls under categories like pornography, violence, or hate speech.
- Community guidelines breach:
- If you repeatedly violate community guidelines by engaging in excessive trolling, harassment, or inflammatory comments, your account could be suspended.
- Spamming:
- Posting excessive promotional content or repetitive comments across different journals can lead to suspension.
- Security concerns:
- If your account is suspected of being compromised or used for malicious activity, LiveJournal may suspend it to protect other users.
What to do if your account is suspended:
- Check your email:
- LiveJournal will usually send an email explaining the reason for your suspension.
- Review the Terms of Service:
- Make sure you understand the platform's rules and what constitutes a violation.
- Contact support:
- If you believe the suspension is a mistake, reach out to LiveJournal's support team to appeal the decision….”
4:56PM: So I suppose I shall chalk up LiveJournal’s reasoning for my account suspension was due to spam. As I was posting and sharing so frequently in that website. Well, not anymore. Let me delete my LiveJournal link. I live and I learn and I move on. This situation is also a sign that I should actually keep a physical journal and not just a public journal. I need to keep both.
4:59PM: I will not even try getting my LiveJournal account back and active. It is not worth it. The trouble is not worth it.
5:09PM: I am working at brainstorming some movie notes inside of my private movie sequels group chat.
5:10PM: I may order food soon.
5:15PM: The more I see articles and information about James Cameron’s upcoming movie, Avatar: Fire and Ash, the more excited and hopeful I get for this next adventure. I used to not be so excited for this next installment but the news about this movie recently has Myself hooked and hyped.
5:17PM: James Cameron’s movie hype reminds me a lot about my own. As my movie sequels progress, things get more and more ambitious. This current one that I am working on is nothing like the first two. It shall be crazy. And the next movie after that shall be even CRAZIER! Here’s to making more movies! Here is to following our passions!
5:28PM: Oh I just ordered food a few minutes ago. But my money is now running low. I will need to endure it until I get my physical EBT card.
5:39PM: I am experiencing and have just experienced another severe form of Deja Vu. Should I speak to my psychiatrist about this matter?
5:42PM: I feel so agitated at the clients here at this Emergency Housing that I am currently staying at. I shall not make eye-contact.
5:43PM: I like being so busy now. Is it overwhelming? Yes. Yes indeed it is. But it is helping me get somewhere in my life. My choices that I am making now are helping me get to where I want to be in my life. I can now officially say that I have absolutely no time for bullshit and drama, nor toxicity. From anyone who are not Myself.
5:56PM: I just finished my food. I ordered soft tacos from Miguel’s Jr. Five soft tacos. I do not believe that I enjoy bean and cheese burritos as much as I used to anymore.
5:58PM: Let me add this Emergency Housing’s kitchen curfew into my Important Info personal notes… If I have not already.
6:07PM: Remind me to listen to the song, Million Dollar Bill, by Whitney Houston. Remind me to listen to it tonight.
6:08PM: I am now going to brainstorm on the upcoming sequel movies both in my personal notes as well as in my private movie sequels group chat.
6:36PM: So much is going on. I am shaking. I feel so overwhelmed and sad. There are so many unresolved issues with Myself and my family.
6:39PM: It was in regard to that whole Superbowl situation. I am not mad at my family. But there are clearly some unresolved issues and concerns from my end. Because I still do not feel like I see eye-to-eye with them. Oh well. I am almost ready to fully walk away and love them from a distance. My casket, my life.
6:41PM: I am going to take my PRN medication right now. And then I shall list down my allergies.
6:46PM: Took my PRN meds. Now I shall work on my allergies list.
7:04PM: I may brainstorm my movies later. For now? I AM GOING TO LISTEN TO MILLION DOLLAR BILL BY WHITNEY HOUSTON!
7:05PM: Remind me to search up Whitney Houston Million Dollar Bill live. I do not think I have ever seen her live performance of this song…
7:11PM: Remind me to pick out my outfit for tomorrow at the Emergency Housing.
I shall wear my robe after I take a shower. Then next week I shall wear my black jacket.
7:36PM: My low-back hurts and aches. It is because of the current chair that I am sitting on.
7:38PM: I am going to brainstorm on my upcoming movies now..
7:45PM: My cellphone is now currently 100%. I am now going to go upstairs, pick my clothes for tomorrow and next week, and go rest on my bed.
7:57PM: Currently on my bed. I am thankful and grateful that I have a safe place to sleep.
8:28PM: I just did what I needed to do. And now I will read more about Avatar: Fire and Ash. Like an article.
8:43PM: I am now going to go to sleep. Good night! See you tomorrow.
February 8th, 2025 on Saturday….
4:11AM: Just woke up from my sleep. I had the best dream ever. We were on this sled-like structure and we were going really really fast down these hills. And there were feelings of weightlessness. There were a couple of trains in the dream. It was so much fun… I am going to go back to sleep now. And I shall try to sleep in.
6:41AM: I had another more personal dream and it was so much fun.
7:24AM: I did not feel like sleeping in currently. But I cannot wait to take my shower tonight. Or I may take it in the middle of the day. I shall just have to see.
7:33AM: I believe I am going to take my shower this morning. After I finish typing up my movie script for the day. Then after this, I shall see if I am still up for brainstorming for my upcoming movie sequels later on throughout the day. And BREAK!
8:10AM: Just got done with my best shower ever. I am now in some new clean and comfy clothes. And I am now ready to type my movie script.
8:21AM: Just finished typing up my movie script for the day. But I would like to focus on brainstorming in my notes for the upcoming movie sequels. However, it is great progress so far. And I celebrate this small win.
8:27AM: I personally feel and think that the staff working in movie theaters should add a metal detector at the entrance. It could save some peoples’ lives as the movie theaters are known to have an issue of getting shot up at.
8:31AM: Google’s AI Overview states….
“AI Overview
The decision of whether to add metal detectors at movie theaters for gun safety depends on a number of factors, including cost, customer willingness to pay, and privacy concerns.
Cost
- Metal detectors can cost hundreds of thousands of dollars to install, staff, and supervise.
- The cost of operating a security checkpoint can range from $250,000 to $1,000,000.
- Customers may not be willing to pay higher ticket prices for added security.
Customer willingness to pay
- Some moviegoers support additional security measures, but may not be willing to pay more for them.
- Some moviegoers may not feel safer when they see metal detectors in the lobby.
Privacy concerns
- Some people believe that being searched at movie theaters is an invasion of their privacy.
- People with concealed weapons permits may want to be allowed to protect themselves.
Effectiveness
- Metal detectors are effective at detecting firearms intended for mass casualties.
- However, some question whether metal detectors could have prevented specific shootings….”
Me: “So let me guess. It is about the money. That is why these movie theaters in our current time do not want to install those metal detectors?”
8:32AM: Me: “Should they not work on maintaining public safety first? When it comes to businesses, it is never about the quality of care and life nor service most of the time, it is always about that stupid green paper….”
8:34AM: Myself: “Yes I understand, but you must realize how expensive $250,000 to $1,000,000 dollars truly is. That is a crazy amount of money. And maintaining these metal detectors is even more expensive potentially.”
8:35AM: Me: “Yes but if Six Flags Magic Mountain can install MULTIPLE metal detectors, then fucking movie theaters can as well. Please do not make excuses for me.”
8:36AM: Myself: “I am not making excuses for you. But you need to understand that theme parks such as Six Flags Magic Mountain and Knott’s Berry Farm tend to make a lot more money than movie theaters currently make. So much more money.”
8:37AM: Me: “Whatever.”
The History of the Performing Arts…..
Me: “Hm. What is the difference between Theatre and Theater? If there is any difference at all? Let me look it up…”
8:40AM: Here it is. From Google’s AI Overview….
“AI Overview
"Theater" is the preferred spelling in American English, while "theatre" is preferred in British English. Both spellings refer to a building where performances take place, or to the art of theatrical production.
Explanation
- The word "theater" comes from the Greek word theatron, which means "a place of seeing".
- The word "theatre" originated in Old French, which borrowed from the Greek word theates, meaning "spectator".
- The words "theater" and "theatre" are pronounced almost the same in most dialects of English.
- When writing, you should consider your audience's preference and use the spelling that they are more likely to use.
Examples in Use
- In the United States, you might say "movie theater".
- In Great Britain, you might say "going to the cinema" or "going to the pictures".
- Some venues may use "theatre" to indicate a focus on the performing arts.
- Movie houses may prefer "theater" to indicate a place for cinema…”
Me: “Hm. I always thought that Theatre was referring to stage plays and onstage productions and performances. While Theater was referring to those silver screen cinemas. But I guess I was wrong.”
8:44AM: Hm. I may post the history of both music and theater. Give me one moment please….
8:45AM: Here is a brief history about the origins of Theater in our current understanding. From Google’s AI Overview….
“AI Overview
The true history of theater is widely believed to have originated in ancient Greece, specifically with ritualistic performances held in honor of the god Dionysus, where the celebrations gradually evolved into more structured dramatic presentations, with the first known actors performing in dedicated amphitheaters; this is considered the foundation of Western theater as we know it today, with key figures like Thespis often cited as the first known actor.
Key points about the origins of theater:
- Religious roots:
- Most historians agree that theater emerged from religious rituals, with early performances often tied to fertility gods like Dionysus, involving elements of singing, dancing, and storytelling to celebrate harvest seasons or appease deities.
- Greek development:
- Ancient Greece saw the formalization of theater with the creation of dedicated spaces like amphitheaters, where playwrights like Aeschylus, Sophocles, and Euripides produced tragedies, comedies, and satyr plays with a chorus playing a key role.
- Masks and costumes:
- Early Greek actors wore large masks to represent characters clearly from a distance, and costumes were often symbolic and elaborate.
- Thespis as a pivotal figure:
- Thespis is often credited as the first known actor, with the term "thespian" now used to refer to an actor.
Important points to consider:
- Other ancient civilizations:
- While Greece is considered the birthplace of Western theater, evidence suggests that theatrical practices existed in other ancient civilizations like Egypt, India, and China, potentially even earlier than Greece.
- Evolution through time:
- Theater has evolved significantly over time, with major developments occurring during the Roman Empire, the Medieval period (with religious mystery plays), the Renaissance (with Shakespeare's works), and the modern era with diverse theatrical styles emerging…”
8:46AM: Myself: “Great! Now let us find out the true history of music as we currently know it. Then, I shall search up the true history of the Performing Arts….”
8:47AM: Just one moment please. Give me one moment as I look and search it up…
8:49AM: Google’s AI Overview states….
“AI Overview
The history of music is likely as old as humanity itself, with evidence of musical instruments dating back tens of thousands of years.
Early instruments
- Flutes: The oldest known flutes are made of bone and ivory and date back to 43,000 years ago.
- Percussion instruments: Rocks and sticks were likely the first percussion instruments used in religious ceremonies.
- Harps: The Egyptians had created harps by 4000 BCE.
- Lyres: Lyres were developed by 3500 BCE.
- Double-reeded clarinets: Double-reeded clarinets were developed by 3500 BCE.
- Natural trumpets: An early form of the trumpet was developed in Denmark by 2500 BCE.
- Guitars: The Hittites created the guitar in 1500 BCE.
Early music
- Oral traditions: Many ancient musical styles were likely preserved in oral traditions.
- Monophony and improvisation: Ancient music was often characterized by monophony and improvisation.
- Closely aligned texts: In ancient song forms, the texts were closely aligned with music.
Early written music
- Sumerian clay tablet: The earliest fragment of musical notation is found on a 4,000-year-old Sumerian clay tablet….”
8:50AM: Okay. Now we are going to search up the history of the Performing Arts. And then I shall watch a live performance of Whitney Houston’s song, I Look to You live from Germany. It is one of my favorite performance of that song from her. The second favorite performance of the song was when Miss Whitney Houston performed I Look to You with Kim Burrell at the Gospel Awards Celebration in 2011. Okay I am getting sidetracked. Let me find the true history of the Performing Arts. Give me one moment please….
8:53AM: This is what I was able to find in the brief moment. Here is what Google’s AI Overview states…
“The history of performing arts can be traced back to ancient civilizations, with evidence of music, dance, and theater in Egypt and Greece. Performances were used to honor deities, tell stories, and express gratitude for a good harvest.
Ancient times
- Music and dance: Performances date back to prehistoric times
- Circus skills: Evidence of circus skills dates back to Ancient Egypt
- Theater: The ancient Greeks performed rituals to honor Dionysus, the god of wine and fertility
20th century
- Performance art: Performance art emerged in the 1910s as an alternative to traditional art forms. It was influenced by Dadaism and Futurism.
- Vaudeville: A popular form of live entertainment in the 1800s that included music, plays, and magic shows
- Theater Boom: The 1920s saw a period of growth for Broadway and other theaters
Other notable periods
- Church theater
- Miracle plays were performed in England in 1110, and Passion Plays were performed in towns like York, Chester, and Wakefield in the late Middle Ages
- Morality plays
- Performed between 1400 and 1550, these plays taught moral values to audiences….”
More About My Day (A Personal Rant Included)…..
8:54AM: Okay perfect. Now let us search up that Germany performance from Whitney Houston… I will be right back as I put on my headphones.
9:32AM: I listened to Whitney Houston’s song and was watching her family’s funeral services. And it gets me so excited for death. Death is not something to be feared. But to be looked forward to.
9:33AM: Currently playing the song Shall Not Want by Elevation Worship & Maverick City….
9:58AM: I: “You cannot fight nature. Nature always wins. The natural flow of the Ancient Harmony shall always reign supreme…”
10:01AM: My checking’s bank account is negative -$20.00 currently. Great….
10:06AM: I have so much more work left to do in this life of mine. I have so much more to accomplish….
10:24AM: After searching my name up. Here is what Google’s AI Overview states…
“AI Overview
Einai Sasa is an actor and filmmaker who was born on May 29, 2002. He also directed the 2022 film Einai Sasa's Winged.
Filmmaking:
- Sasa is an actor and filmmaker.
- He directed the 2022 film Einai Sasa's Winged.
- The film is about a young child who goes on a journey to an enchanted realm after experiencing great loss.
Acting: Sasa is an actor….”
1:46PM: I am currently going through a challenge right now. The ROBLOX account that I had used to film the movie Winged (2022) is not letting me log back in now.
If it does not let me log in, I may need to start the production straight from scratch. I will find a way to get it back. I got this.
2:00PM: Myself: “My advice to you when it comes to this ROBLOX situation is to be prepared to lose your account. You have already made a new one. So just focus on building newer and better sets. How unfortunate it is I know. But you have to move on. Perhaps the quality of the sets shall change with this new account. Oh do not despair.”
2:05PM: So I basically lost my account. An account that I have had since 2015. Just gone. Change can be so brutal sometimes. Geez. Sheesh.
2:07PM: I just saw a really really bright white and black sparkle with my right eye just now.
2:10PM: Me: “Oh I feel so sad. Is my ROBLOX account really gone and unable to be accessed? I created a new one yes. But this means I am going to have to build from the ground up once more. I am just really sad right now…”
2:12PM: Let me listen to some sad music….
2:17PM: I currently play the song, Overcome, by Skott right now…
2:25PM: I suppose as unfortunate as it is that I lost my main Winged 1 (2022) ROBLOX movie set account, having a new account now gives me more opportunity to build my newer movie sets not only better, but also more efficient as well.
2:27PM: So instead of being all sad, I need to look at what happened as a newer opportunity for me to build my movie sets even better, and more efficient. And I need to look at this as an opportunity to be even more creative. Creative in ways Winged 1 (2022) was not.
2:28PM: As I have said before, the more these film sequels progress, the more ambitious they become. And plus, nothing lasts forever. So I need to learn to adapt to these changes and I also need to learn to move on as well.
2:29PM: I live and I learn and I move on…
2:41PM: I am now going to play the song known as Blow the Whistle, by Too $hort right now. This will be the first time I am listening to this song with my headphones on. Here I go. I cannot wait…
2:43PM: Blow the Whistle is such a fun song. HaHAH!
2:46PM: I am now going to play the song For the Lovers, by Whitney Houston. It is a part of her I Look to You (2009) final studio album…
3:33PM: In what seems like such a long time. I am going to finally allow Myself to relax…
3:37PM: Google’s AI Overview states….
“AI Overview
When a toxic family member gets angry at you and blames you for everything, it's often called scapegoating; this is a dynamic where someone is consistently blamed for problems, even when they aren't responsible, to protect the image or feelings of others in the family.
Key points about scapegoating:
- Blame-shifting:
- This is a core aspect of scapegoating, where the person deflects their own issues and responsibilities onto the scapegoat.
- Emotional manipulation:
- Scapegoating can be a form of emotional manipulation, making the blamed person feel guilty and responsible for situations they didn't cause.
Another term that might apply in this situation is "gaslighting":
- Gaslighting: This involves manipulating someone into doubting their own perception of reality by twisting situations and making them believe they are at fault, even when they aren't….”
3:39PM: Me: “Yup. Scapegoating and Gaslighting are pretty much what my entire family do to me. If you are all reading this, you clearly know and understand what you are doing. And this is your opportunity to stop. Before I cut you all off from my life and I choose to love you from a complete distance, like I always say I will do.
There are a couple of family members that use Myself as a Scapegoat and if you two are reading this, I bet you know who you are, and you need to stop. I am not asking you to stop, I am telling you to. Because if you do not, I no longer have the patience to keep forgiving you. Nor do I have the patience to keep you in my life.
This is my adventure and MY story, and if you will not respect Myself nor my boundaries, I will respectfully leave you out of my life. You do not have to be with me. Nor are you obligated to participate within my life.
If I die alone, then that is fine. I would rather die alone, happy and content with myself, than die surrounded by people who I feel do not truly support me, or people who I feel will turn their backs on me on an absolute whim. Anyways, that is my mic-drop.”
3:48PM: An example of my family using me as a Scapegoat and Gaslighting me happened yesterday on the night of February 7th, 2025 on a Friday. My own relative said in a very manipulative manner something along the lines of, “It is clear that this family means nothing to you.”
This statement was said because I was expressing how I was truly feeling. And I was not initially mad at the situation. Even if I were, everyone gets mad including my family, but they choose to pick on me and act like I am the absolute villain. I am not playing the victim. I am simply stating how I feel.
I know I am not the entire villain. Nor am I the entire hero. Each day is a constant battle of right versus wrong for me. I will not sit around and as though I am perfect. I have been the villain so many times. But it is the fact that I TRY to become better constantly that matters. We have the right and power to choose to do good for ourselves.
My family members act like it is absolutely illegal for me to feel upset and angry at them when I personally feel as though they overstep my boundaries and/or when they mistreat me. It is like they get upset at me for getting mad at them if they slap on the face with their disrespect.
Almost all of my family members like to play the victim and blame me for everything. When in reality it takes TWO TO TANGO! Am I perfect? NO! But if my family are reading this, YOU ARE NOT PERFECT EITHER.
Stop using me as your Scapegoat. Stop demanding me to be perfect. And stop gaslighting Me into submitting to your will and your way of life. My life, my casket. My casket? MY LIFE!
I personally feel as though my family treats me like this, because I am currently the only one in my family who is officially diagnosed with very real mental illness conditions such as psychosis and schizophrenia.
If you will not stand by my side and accept Myself as I am, then get out of my way. I will keep becoming better in this life of mine or I will die trying. I am done with the negative cycles of the generational trauma.
None of you define me, no strangers, no friends, and no family members alike define who I get to choose to be. Enough is enough. I choose to be better.
I bet you all have mental health issues, it is just that they are not officially diagnosed by a licensed mental health professional. Do not treat Me like I am less than because my mental health issues are out in the open and out in the light, and yours are not.
You are not above me, nor am I below you. We are all human, and we are all initially equal. I have boundaries now. And I am very much ready to die for myself, and my freedom.
4:19PM: Hm. It seems as though Instagram will not let me share the entire rant. But let me just post this entire Public Diary Entry then. Then I shall make a post talking about how I posted this entry…
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